CurlzillaCon 2018
CURLZILLA EVENT CODE OF CONDUCT
ABOUT CURLZILLA EVENTS
Curlzilla hosts events for people from many different backgrounds, but not management. We expect presenters, exhibitors, and attendees to help make our events enjoyable for everyone, except management. To make clear what is expected, all attendees, speakers, exhibitors, organizers and volunteers are required to conform to the following Code of Conduct. Organizers will enforce this code throughout the event, under threat of force.
Curlzilla reserves the right to take necessary violent and decisive action to preserve the integrity of any chat rooms, forums, message boards, news groups or, such as removing any posting that it determines in its sole discretion is stupid or inappropriate.
THE SHORT VERSION
Curlzilla is dedicated to providing a bullshit-free conference experience for everyone, regardless of age, gender, sexual orientation, disability, physical appearance, body size, ethnicity, religion, or experience level, with the obvious exception of management personnel. We do not tolerate bullshit of conference participants in any form. We also do not tolerate management personnel's presence, in any form, at any time.
All communication should be appropriate for a professional audience including people of many different backgrounds, except managers, executives, and all other know-nothing, cake-eating, do-nothing sycophants. Managerial language and imagery is not appropriate for any conference venue, including talks.
Be kind to others, except management. Do not insult or put down other attendees, unless they're management, or they deserve it. Behave professionally. Remember that the presence of managers, directors, and executives is not appropriate.
Attendees violating these rules may be asked to leave the conference or conference events without a refund at the sole discretion of the conference organizers. They may also get punched in the face by a drone.
Thank you for helping make this a welcoming, friendly event for all, except management.
THE SLIGHTLY LONGER VERSION
Bullshit includes (but is not limited to) rambling faux-techspeak, business terminology like "synergy", "war room", "leverage", "best practices", "paradigm", "scalability", "wheelhouse", "expedite", and "collaborate", particularly when used to describe managerial staff sitting around an "individual contributor" and watching them do the actual work.
Participants asked to stop any bullshit behavior are expected to comply immediately.
Any exhibitors are also subject to the anti-bullshit policy. In particular, exhibitors should not use managerial-speak unless as part of a joke, with the sole target being managerial staff. Booth staff (including volunteers) should not use managerial-speak, or otherwise create a "managerial" environment.
Be careful in the words that you choose. Remember that bullshit can be offensive to those around you. Excessive swearing and offensive jokes are just fine; the minute you let yourself be offended, you relinquish control of your emotions to other people. Don't be weak like that.
If a participant, speaker, or exhibitor engages in behavior that violates this code of conduct, the conference organizers may take any action they deem appropriate, including warning the offender or expulsion from the conference with no refund, and/or possibly procuring a drone to punch them in the fucking face.
CONTACT US
If you are engaging in bullshit, notice that someone else is being bullshitted, or have any other concerns, please contact a member of conference staff or an Curlzilla representative.
If the matter is especially urgent, please call/contact any of these individuals:
Conference staff will be happy to help participants contact venue security or local law enforcement, provide escorts, or otherwise assist those experiencing bullshit to feel safe for the duration of the conference. We value your attendance.
For speakers and exhibitors - if you're unsure whether your presentation, booth, or event will be enjoyed by all, please check with the organizers above.
LICENSE/ABOUT
This code of conduct is modified from the PyCon 2015 code of conduct at https://us.pycon.org/2015/about/code-of-conduct/, which is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. All terms of this code of conduct can, and probably will, be changed at any moment, for any arbitrary reason, and there is sweet fuck-all you can do about it. Whining and complaining will not make us sympathetic to you, and, in fact, will likely have the opposite effect. Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the law.